095 | The “Refinement” Stage of Psychedelic Integration: Personal Style, Slow Fashion & Conscious Consumption
“Imagine that you’re fine tuning the dials of your life and addressing the details that are not aligned with your values and your truth. This is what I call the refinement stage of psychedelic integration.”
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What in the world is a psychedelics podcast doing talking about “personal style” and fashion?! This has to be the first. But discovering your personal style is identity work that requires vulnerability. It’s a deeply meaningful journey of self discovery. If you don’t see the connection now, then you will by the end of this podcast.
In this episode, I am introducing a concept around the different stages of psychedelic integration: There is the “heavy lifting” stage where we’re doing deep work to significantly improve our lives, followed by the “refinement” stage which is a lighter process of fine tuning.
For me, this refinement process is showing up in my journey to discover my personal style. The misalignment between my identity and my wardrobe has come up a few times during psychedelic journeys, and I am finally addressing it so that the outside is a true reflection of my inside. I also make the connection between the responsibility to find your personal style, living a values-based life, and sustainable consumption.
In this episode, I talk about:
The “heavy lifting” vs “refinement” stages of psychedelic integration
The connection between life satisfaction and values-alignment
How refinement is showing up for me through personal style
How personal style came up during my psychedelic experiences
Why I stopped caring about fashion during my healing chapter
Why I started caring about fashion again after my healing chapter
Fast fashion overconsumption as a result of not knowing my personal style
My core values that are aligned with knowing my personal style
My journey to discover my personal style so far
Consumption habits and making wise purchase decisions
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Where to find Lana:
I was introduced to psychedelics in my early 20s within rave culture, and few years later I began to use plant medicine ceremonially.
Many circumstances aligned leaving me shattered, and I began the journey of putting myself back together. Plant medicine & psychedelics saved me from depression, anxiety, and a life of feeling unworthy. This is now my life’s work and I have devoted myself to sharing psychedelics and plant medicines with others because I have personally experienced how effectively they can catalyze growth, healing and connection.
This idea for Modern Psychedelics came to me during a journaling session in early 2020. I was learning so much about psychedelics at the time (while experiencing the benefits firsthand), and I had a deep desire to talk about these topics with people in the field. Upon launching the Instagram community, the page grew tremendously over a short period of time and continues to have high levels of engagement.
I am a 3x certified professional life coach, and I work with people who want to better their lives by deeply integrating insights from their psychedelic experiences. I believe that we don’t have to spend our entire lives healing, and that the purpose of life is to live in the present moment.
Looking for a professional coach to support you on your psychedelic path?
Look no further! Along with being the host of the Modern Psychedelics Podcast, Lana is a 3x certified professional coach who works with people on the psychedelic path.
Podcast Transcipt
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Lana Pribic: [00:00:00] Hello, everyone. Happy summer. It is feeling like summer over here in Canada and it feels good. So I am excited to share this solo episode with you guys today. Before we get into it, just want to let you guys know that if you are interested in , my life coaching program, it is, it's filling up, it's filling up these days.
I'm not gonna lie, but at this moment, at the time of recording, Friday, May 24th, I have two spots open for June and then one spot open for July. So if you're wanting to jump into my six month coaching program this summer, check it out. Go ahead and click the link in the show notes or go to [00:01:00] modernpsychedelics.
net slash apply. And we can get on a discovery call together and see if it's the right program for you. Okay. So let's get into today's topic episode, and I'm framing it in a type of psychedelic integration format. And I really want to talk to you guys about, yeah this process of psychedelic integration, it looks different depending on where you are at.
I know that my integration work these days, about five years into my work with medicine looks a lot different than it did, Four, five, even three, even two years ago, honestly. I think this really speaks to this idea that psychedelics are not for any one person.
They are not for any one condition. They are not for any one thing. And they can really support us through these different phases in our life. It's not like [00:02:00] we just don't You know do all the heavy lifting and are done with it and move on with our lives. Sure we can if you're like me, if you're listening to this podcast you are probably in pursuit of constant refinement, constant up levels, constant upgrades to your life.
Not because You're not good enough, but because, you just want to experience all that life has to offer. So I'm going to start this episode by talking about the two different phases that I am identifying in integration. So this is my own little theory. I didn't get this from anywhere. It's just based on my own personal work and my coaching practice with dozens and dozens of clients who are walking this path.
So There's the heavy lifting phase of integration and the refinement phase of integration. I'm going to break that down for you guys, then I'm going to get into how my psychedelic experiences have motivated me to address [00:03:00] finding my personal style. Yes, we are talking about personal style, clothing, fashion, how we present ourselves and carry ourselves in the world .
And then I'm going to get into how finding your personal style is a part of living a values aligned life. I'm going to get into my own journey with personal style, . Embarking on a journey of personal style seems really superficial on the surface, and I get that.
I totally get that. But, in fact, what I'm learning is that it's honestly as deep as any other form of self discovery, and I'm just really excited to share what I've been learning about becoming a more conscious consumer and how I'm navigating expression and using this as a type of identity work.
And then lastly, I'm going to finish talking about shifting consumption habits and building a sustainable wardrobe. I want to touch on this because It's very [00:04:00] common for people who engage with psychedelics to understand the responsibility that comes with being a custodian of this earth. And I'm going to talk a little bit about the fashion industry and what that means.
Finding your personal style has to do with being a more conscious consumer. So this episode is definitely not for everyone. Not everyone loves fashion. Not everyone really cares about clothes and that's okay, but we all do have to get dressed every day, right? Unless we are, forest people living in ancient ways without clothing, which, you know.
I'm guessing is probably not anyone listening to this podcast. I could be wrong, but we do all have to get dressed every single day. Maybe you will find something in here for you to find your personal style. You really have to be willing to get vulnerable and real with yourself. This really is [00:05:00] deep work.
So let's get into it. I encourage you to just stay open and take this journey with me for the next 30 minutes or so. So let's talk about the heavy lifting phase versus the refinement phase of integration. You might be tuning into this episode after seeing the title and wondering, what the heck? What does fashion or clothing or personal style, whatever that is, have to do with psychedelics?
It's really frivolous to even address this or care about what we look like. Maybe you are judging me a little bit right now for bringing this forward and that's okay. That's okay. As long as you are here and listening, I really don't mind being judged. I promise you there is a through line
and I want to share just how important it is for any conscious human being to have a personal sense of style. So it's going to come as a surprise to you that personal style is like I said, identity work just [00:06:00] as much as any other area of life you might be exploring with psychedelics. So let's break this down.
We do psychedelics They give us a lot of insights into who we truly are and what is important in life. The integration work after is about aligning your life with these insights at the start of the journey. It's all about the heavy lifting and the integration can be really intense.
The heavy lifting phase of integration is really about releasing the past and stepping into the present moment. It's about aligning the bigger things in life with who you now know yourself to be. So think about things like career, relationship, maybe your living situation.
It's like those really, big things in life. At this point, we are making shift so that the inner changes, the inner insights are reflected externally Over time, if you keep at it, making consistent changes, staying devoted to your process, staying devoted to your true self, things will start [00:07:00] to smooth out, right?
The big things that were once out of alignment start to become more in alignment and life starts to feel a little bit more peaceful. So It helps if we think of this in terms of life satisfaction or fulfillment.
This is the natural place for me to go as a life coach. You may be familiar with a coaching tool called the Wheel of Life. I use this as an introductory inventory tool with my clients, and it's really simple. There are these eight different areas of life that you rate on a scale of one to 10 based on how satisfied or fulfilled you feel in each area.
So the areas include things like Personal finances, health and being, relationships, career, fun and enjoyment, , one is the lowest level of satisfaction and ten is the highest level of satisfaction. , What's interesting about this is that people will usually rate areas of their life that are not in alignment with [00:08:00] their values much lower than areas that are in alignment with our values.
And that's because we just feel more fulfilled and satisfied in life when we're living a life in alignment with our values. I want you to remember this point throughout the rest of the episode. So let's put a pin in that. People tend to feel more satisfied and fulfilled in areas of their life that they are living in alignment with their values.
Most of us entering the path of transformational work will start at an overall low level of satisfaction, which is what prompts us to do the work in the first place. And we're probably sitting honestly anywhere from like a one to four. Out of 10 in most of those areas. So this heavy lifting phase of integration, it usually is the process that takes us from that low level of satisfaction to a higher level of satisfaction.
So we may be moving anywhere from a one to three, a one to four up to a seven [00:09:00] or an eight. And that jump, that leap from a low level of satisfaction to a fairly high level of satisfaction is strongly felt. It can take years to work up to this point. It takes a lot of consistent dedication, practice, work, support, but it's definitely possible.
And when we reflect on that leap, we're like, wow, I can't believe that. I'm just so much happier in this area now than I was before. So once we reach this higher level of satisfaction in life, obviously, there's still room to grow. But the work just becomes a little bit lighter, a little more fun, and a little bit more different.
Detailed. This is what I call the refinement stage of psychedelic integration. Imagine that you're fine tuning the dials of your life and addressing the details that are not aligned with your values and your truth. Going back to the life satisfaction scale, this is the phase When we are already sitting at a high level of satisfaction, [00:10:00] but there's room to be even more satisfied, even more aligned.
So in this refinement stage of integration, we're really aiming to move from an 8 to a 9 or a 10, for example. Does that make sense? So less satisfied in life means that you have a higher mountain to climb and integration is more intense. It's a bit of a. Higher climb, a bigger climb, a bigger journey, a bigger trek to take, more satisfied in life means that you're already high up on the mountain, right?
You've already done the work to get pretty high up on the mountain. And while the view is pretty great where you're at right now, it could also be better. I would say that I entered the refinement stage. a little bit after my Iboga journey. After that I settled, I integrated a new way of being in the world.
I found inner peace with myself. I showed up every day with confidence about who I am and where I'm going. And [00:11:00] that really settled me at a level eight, maybe even a nine in most areas of my life. And just getting up to that point was, I mean, you guys can go back and listen. It's all documented on this podcast.
At least some of it is. And yeah, you can, you can, you can kind of chart that what that climb has been like for me. So now that we kind of understand what I mean by the refinement stage of psychedelics, I want to talk to you guys a little bit about what that actually looks like. And one of the ways that that is expressing itself in my life right now is finding my personal style. So I'm going to talk to you a little bit about.
What my motivation was to finally address this area to finally look at this dial in my life and be like, that needs a little bit of fine tuning and how this really came up for me during my psychedelic experiences. So a little bit of a backstory here. I have always been [00:12:00] very interested in fashion and clothes.
I definitely got this from my mama. She has amazing style. She taught me so much about fabrics, proportions, styling, like how things should fit, what goes together. She was actually a seamstress back in Yugoslavia and she actually made all of her own clothes. She made her family clothes. She made, Clothes for boutiques that she worked at, it is a part of who she is.
She's just, she's so chic and put together and I would honestly just do just about anything to get my hands on some of the pieces that she wore when she was my age. And it's so funny. She'll always look at things in my wardrobe now, some of my favorite pieces and be like, wow, like I had something exactly like that when I was your age.
So I've definitely developed this like passion for fashion and definitely my style [00:13:00] is Heavily influenced by my mom and I'm not complaining about that because yeah, like I said, she's just so put together and Just so elegant Being European also gives me a very intense interest in fashion for those of you guys who don't know I was born in former Yugoslavia And yeah, taking your appearance seriously is kind of a cultural norm in many European countries.
It's not seen as frivolous. It's seen as a sign of respect to yourself and to others to put care into your appearance and to put care into the clothing that you put on, your hair, just putting yourself together. It's a cultural norm. And, I think that's neutral. Some people might see that as a bad or frivolous thing.
Some people might not see an issue with it. I think it's neutral. It's just a part of the culture. And I think when I see it as part of the culture, it's something that I can respect a little bit more easily. But yeah even in [00:14:00] high school, like I experimented with so many different styles, some that are pretty embarrassing.
I went through a preppy phase. I definitely went through an emo phase. I went through this phase where I was like really into I went to this Asian shopping center and wore like some pretty out there things and like leg warmers. I've just, I've experimented a lot and I've always been interested in, you know, what my clothes say about me and what I want to express through that.
And I've always used it as a vehicle for self expression. So as I started doing the inner work, therapy, psychedelics, coaching. I swung to the opposite end of the spectrum. And I started developing this mindset that well, that's frivolous. That's not important. What really matters is the inner stuff.
And I think that this kind of served me at the time because I was very hyper focused on the inner work. And honestly, like I [00:15:00] caring about fashion was like, just not something that Was helpful to me at that time because I was I just had much bigger fish to fry. Let's say but now Being in this refinement stage.
I'm really coming to understand that the clothes I wear and how I put myself together really play a huge role in my energy and how I step forward in the world I have really big aspirations for my let's call it career, my vocation, the legacy that I want to leave behind the service that I want to give to humans on this earth.
And it really is this process of refinement of like, okay well, what role do the clothes that I wear play in that? And it turns out they do play a role, maybe not as big of a role as the inner work, but they do play a role again, refinement. And as someone who like [00:16:00] really values self expression and advocates for self expression, I am coming back to fashion and I'm excited to, build a closet and a wardrobe that reflects who I now know myself to be.
I'm realizing that my respect for fashion is growing. is part of my identity. It's part of who I am. It's in my DNA. And I'm really like I'm claiming that now and it feels so good. So I've been intending to address my wardrobe and how I present myself for a while now. It just wasn't really a priority, like I said, because it wasn't the thing that was going to take me from a three to an eight in life satisfaction.
But I did notice through the years, the tension and the misalignment that I felt whenever I opened my closet up to get dressed. And it was always something that I was like, I'll address that at some point. I'll address that at some point. But right now, bigger fish to fry. What I noticed was the mismatch of who I am now and who my wardrobe says I am.
I remember I had a [00:17:00] call with my Previous life coach, Liz, love you, Liz. If you're potentially listening to this I had a coach coaching session with her, I don't know, maybe like a year and a half ago, it was like, it was before Eboga, but it was, I was really starting to feel like at a, maybe like a six in life satisfaction.
And I was just starting to realize more and more that, the outside wasn't reflecting who I was on the inside. And we had a whole coaching session on this. So I'm going to talk a little bit now about how This has shown up in my psychedelic journey.
So I remember when I was at Iboga Wellness Center during the discovery day, after my first flood dose of Iboga, I was very much in it. I was having so many breakthroughs about where in life I have been confused. So Iboga is this medicine that Just lifts the confusion and helps you to see truth in life.
And I was just seeing all these ways that I was not in alignment with my [00:18:00] true self. So if you want to listen to episode 45 and hear all about that Ceremony and journey. It's a good listen. If you haven't one of my most favorite Top downloaded podcasts. It's episode 45. We will link it in the show notes for you, but I was sitting outside at the hammock and I remember I looked down at myself and I started laughing.
I was wearing this like linen button up shirt and I forget what top might have been like a sports bra and I was wearing these shorts that I wore when I was training Muay Thai. And I looked down and I was just like, Oh my God, even my wardrobe is confused. What am I doing here? What am I trying to say?
I just felt like my way of dressing was not cohesive to who I am. I remember being like, look at all these things I'm trying to be, like, this doesn't feel like me. And then six months later, I did a Shipibo ayahuasca ceremony, which I which [00:19:00] I have a trip report of in episode 60. And during that retreat, oh gosh, I'm integrating so much of that still, honestly, but it just opened up this new layer of femininity and like being a woman and expressing that and living that.
It was so beautiful. And I decided that week, like in the medicine that I wanted to express my femininity through the clothes that I wear. And I was actually in Costa Rica for six months in total. This was the first week and I bought so many new clothes. During my time there, because I would just, I felt this need to express my femininity through some more like flowy clothing.
And then finally, during my 5MEO ceremony, episode 79, I just opened up to all the love and all the beauty in the world. And, [00:20:00] during that retreat, I like I literally gave myself permission, like I wrote in my journal, like I give myself permission to live a life of beauty and to live a beautiful life.
I've always been very in awe and curious about beauty and drawn to beauty. For my astrology people, I have a Taurus moon, beauty is something that really is important to me. It's a part of who I am. I love it. I am in awe of it. I strive for it in so many different ways in life. And I'm not just talking about aesthetics.
I'm talking about like beauty that just like you feel in your heart. Aesthetics are a part of it. But yeah, it's just like that devotion to living a life that is really felt in the heart. So after five, I've been just surrounding myself in the beauty around me. [00:21:00] And, beautifully designed garments.
Fashion is art, right? If you don't believe that watch a season of Project Runway and that'll change your mind. But yeah, these like beautifully designed garments that are designed with intention and detail that make me feel great. It's just one of my most cherished parts about beauty. And I always told myself that one day I would really figure out who I am through fashion and figure out my style and that day has come.
I just want to feel as beautiful on the outside as I do on the inside and I want my outside world to reflect. The confidence and stability and security that I feel in my identity on the inside. And what I've noticed is that my wardrobe doesn't really reflect that. So that kind of leads into how personal style aligns with values.
So let's recall that living a life that is in alignment with our values means that we are [00:22:00] much more likely to feel satisfied and fulfilled in our life. This is why I always do a values assessment with my clients when I onboard them, because values based living is the cornerstone of living. a life of satisfaction and fulfillment.
So not having a clear sense of personal style is not aligned with three of my core values. The first one would be respecting the earth. The second one would be self expression. And the third one is quality. So by personal style, I just want to take a moment to define that this isn't an official definition, just how I understand it to be.
By personal style, I simply mean a way of putting clothing and accessories together that is completely unique to me. It's an expression of who I am, and it's rooted in my identity. So engaging in personal style work is identity work, and it takes a [00:23:00] lot of vulnerability. At one point I was like, I'm intentional about every other area of my life, like so intentional, but why not my wardrobe?
Like why does that just get a free pass? And again, I wasn't in the refinement stage. This is not like the thing that you want to worry about if you're experiencing depression and anxiety and you haven't come to accept yourself and you don't even know who you are. Like, again, this is refinement down the line.
It's not something that's super important, but it is important at some point. So it started to feel important to me to engage in this work. So let's get back to the value. So how does not having a clear sense of personal style, not align with respecting the. Earth and causing as little harm as possible to the earth.
This is so good. Okay. This is about to like Get ready for light bulbs to go off As many of you are probably aware the fast fashion industry is one of the biggest contributors to pollution it depletes soil contaminates fresh water resources [00:24:00] pollutes the air we breathe You destroys our oceans, forests and ecosystems and the health of the biodiversity of the earth.
The fast fashion industry is insane. You know how we have four seasons in the year? The fast fashion industry has 52 seasons. They are releasing new products every single week. So the over consumption of fast fashion obviously leads to more fashion waste I forget what the statistic is, but the majority of stuff that's even donated to thrift stores ends up in the landfill So we think that we're like, you know donating and doing this like good thing by donating to thrift stores but a majority of the time we are not and all of that stuff actually ends up in the landfill anyways, which is really unfortunate.
So the overconsumption of fast fashion is a major issue. Globally, but it is also an issue that is very close to me. There are many issues in the world. We have to choose our battles and choose what we want to put our efforts into we simply [00:25:00] cannot put our efforts towards every single issue in the world.
The earth is one of the things that I care about the most during my time here on it. So this is really important to be so why do I buy fast fashion? Right only to discard these items a few years later. It's because it's more comfortable for me to invest in cheaper fast fashion options because I don't have a clear sense of what my personal style is what my identity through my clothes are.
So why would I invest in an expensive higher quality item if I don't know for sure that it's an investment if I don't know for sure that I'm going to keep it in my closet for years and years to come. This also relates to my value of quality. I value high quality items, high quality food, high quality experiences, and shopping fast fashion means that in general, there's a caveat to this that I'll talk about later, but in general, the quality is lower.
It won't last as long. And honestly, it's probably something that just isn't Going to [00:26:00] last in terms of me actually liking the piece. So from this perspective, it is a sense of duty and responsibility to the earth to find my personal style. If I want to live in, if I want to live in alignment with my values, so I can pivot my consumption habits and shop more sustainable brands.
Invest in some more higher quality, timeless pieces that I can hold onto for longer if I understand what my point of view is in fashion. , when I understand who I am, what I like to wear, what I want to. show to the world. I can invest in better quality items that I know I'll love for years and build a wardrobe that will grow with me.
There are certain pieces in my closet that I have had for over 10 years. They are timeless pieces. They are high quality [00:27:00] pieces. This silk top from Reformation comes to mind that I bought in New York City, honestly, probably 13 years ago. It has a few little holes in it and I hold on to it because it's such good quality.
It's so timeless and I just love it. That's just one example. But I know this to be true when I find something that is really linked to my core identity and represents that. And it's good quality. I will hold on to it for, most of its life cycle. . The second value that I want to talk about is self expression, right?
I am obviously a huge advocate for self expression. expression, not having a clear sense of style means that I'm not expressing myself through my style. I'm expressing who I think I should be, or who the world wants me to be, or who the fashion industry is telling me to be, right? When I develop a sense of who I am through my style, or rather, let me rephrase that, when I am able to express who [00:28:00] I truly am through my style, and be intentional, that I want to do that, I am living in alignment with that value of self expression.
And I have been on this journey for a couple of months now. And honestly, you guys, life just hits different when I'm wearing things that express who I am. And it's not about looking cool. It's not about looking trendy. It's about looking like me. It's much like the work that I did internally to remove all the things that aren't me.
I am now doing that on the outside particularly in this case to my wardrobe. So I want to share with you guys my personal style journey so far and just plant a little seed of inspiration for anyone who also feels a little bit of tension and misalignment, or maybe a lot of tension and misalignment with their wardrobe.
And it's gearing up to maybe address it at some point in the future.
So here's just a little short documentation of my journey, discovering my personal style so far, how it's going and what I am [00:29:00] learning. Everything changed for me when I discovered this woman named Alison Bornstein.
She is Incredible. She's like the queen of helping everyday people like me find their personal style She bridges personal style with wellness. It is just it's so Anyway, she has a book called Wear It Well, and in that book she talks about two main methods that help with discovering your personal style.
One is the closet editing system, and the other is her three word method. I can't recommend this book enough, it's just so good. After reading the book and going through the and going through the chapter on closet editing. I took an entire Sunday to edit my wardrobe. I I smoked a little bit of weed, I'm not gonna lie, which made it an even more wildly emotional experience.
I won't go into the entire process here, you can read about it in her book if you're interested, but I will say that it was so much more cathartic, [00:30:00] so much more emotional than I could have even imagined. I, at one point I was Trying to figure out if I wanted to get rid of this pair of jeans that I have.
They're these skinny jeans that I bought in Australia after I graduated from grad school. I was starting a new relationship at the time. Things were really starting to look up for me. I got them custom fitted. I was working out a lot at the time. My like booty was popping and these jeans are just tied to so many memories from that time in my life.
And I realized that I've been holding on to these jeans because I've been holding on to that time in my life in some way. And yeah, it was just really intense. I actually had to bring the sage out to cleanse the room because my God, the emotions. emanating from that pair of jeans and like everything that they represented was just, it was so [00:31:00] intense.
It was so intense. So all that to say, our wardrobes tell a story. When I look at my wardrobe and when I did this closet editing, day. I could see the story of searching for myself. I could literally see through my clothes, all of the roles and characters that I've tried on over the years as I've been discovering myself.
I could see all the phases I'd been through. All of these attempts to find myself. Honestly, my wardrobe was a little bit confused, which is a reflection of all the confusion I felt for years about who I am. It's a trail of all of these characters that I've tried on.
Well, I really have found myself. Over the years, thanks to psychedelics and all of this work. I know who I am now, right? I know who I am and I just want to be me. [00:32:00] There's no one else. I want to be. I just want to be me in every area of my life, but When I look at my wardrobe, it's stuck in the past. It's stuck in a version of myself who was trying to be anything but herself.
And while there are definitely some key pieces that I've held onto for many years, they always make the cut. And I think these are like the foundation of my personal style that I'm going back to. There's a lot of stuff in there that I bought and allowed into my wardrobe because I was trying to um, Something.
I'm hoping that at this point, you can see that this is actually very deep work. So in realizing that I know who I am now, but who I am is not reflected in my closet.
I'm figuring out what that integration of my identity is. that I've cultivated on the inside looks like on the outside. So I'm learning like, finding personal [00:33:00] style is this journey of combining all of these parts of yourself to reflect yourself in your personal style. It's like, okay, how do I want my meat suit to represent itself to the world?
Like what feels like me? It's, It's hard because we're all so multi dimensional. So when we look at our wardrobes, we have these different parts of ourselves that are represented in our wardrobe. So for example, I have a lot of kind of like ceremonial type of clothing to wear in ceremony or to retreats or when I'm in Costa Rica.
And I love a lot of it. I've decluttered some of it, but a lot of it I've held on to. And then I have this like, you know, European Like, put together, chic, timeless part of me, and I haven't been able to find a way to bridge those two, but they're both a part of me. So this journey of personal style is [00:34:00] finding a way to style different pieces that are a representation of who you are, and they all come together in such a unique way that no one else can put them together in that way because they're a representation of you, not anyone.
I got rid of so many things during this closet editing journey. I did two rounds of decluttering. I did one round and got rid of the really obvious stuff. I gave all of those to my friend who gladly took them. And then I did another round with Alison Bornstein's editing system, which was a little bit trickier because I really had to confront some pieces that I was holding onto for the wrong reasons.
So I sold some to pieces to a consignment shop. I gave a bunch to my friends and I donated the rest. So a note on sustainability here, like every time we invite a new piece. of clothing into our wardrobe, we're responsible for its life cycle. Anything of mine that I purchase that ends up in the landfill is my responsibility.
Like I have to bear that. I have to go to [00:35:00] bed at night knowing that, I sent this t shirt to the landfill or whatever. So the first thing that was important to do in this discovering my personal style journey was the closet edit, like a solid edit of what I have, what I love, what I want to hold onto and what I'm ready to let go of.
That in itself was deeply insightful. The second thing I've been doing to define my personal style is Alison Bornstein's three word method. And she has a whole process to help you discover what your three words are in her book. But the three words that I'm working with right now. are relaxed, funky, and timeless.
And then I have a modifier of edgy in there. And it took so long to come up with these three words. Like I was really sitting with this for a long time. Right now I feel like I've landed in a place. Place that feels like me like these three words relaxed funky timeless. They kind of reflect who I am and my values.
With relaxed. I'm just [00:36:00] naturally drawn towards a more casual laid back down to earth vibe. I want to feel comfortable in my clothes with the timeless piece. I just want my pieces to feel timeless and classic so that I can keep them for years and years to come and I want them to have that really nice quality and just feel Good on my body.
I want to feel good in my clothes. Like I feel so different when I put on my cashmere sweater versus polyester sweater from H& M and it's like, okay noted, right? That aligns with my values of quality and then There's this like funky piece. This was the hardest one to come up with. I was like teetering between like funky, organic um, I forget the other words that I was looking at, but I feel like the funky piece encapsulates kind of my offbeat, rebellious, kind of like artsy, fun personality.
The kind of, it's the piece of me that's, a little bit psychedelic. So yeah, I'm happy with that. And with the [00:37:00] edgy modifier, I have come to understand that I feel most like myself when I bring a little bit of edge to my looks and I feel most me when I balance anything that's really feminine or really soft with some edge.
So I am someone who would never wear just like a pretty dress. I would need to put like my motorcycle leather jacket over top of that. Otherwise, I just I don't feel like me.
So again, Personal style is identity work. The questions I have been asking myself to figure out these words is, who am I? What do I like? What are my values? What am I drawn to? What feels right to me?
What feels like it has tension? How do I express myself? through my style. Of course, these three words are not set in stone, and I imagine that they will change with me. But right now, I think it's a pretty accurate reflection of who I know myself to be on the inside. I had no idea what these three words [00:38:00] were a few months ago.
And now that I've done this work, I feel that I have a direction and that I can truly start building a sustainable wardrobe, a timeless wardrobe that reflects who I am, it's aligned with my values, and it's just full of pieces that I can cherish and just love and see the beauty in for years and years to come.
The last thing I want to talk about is consumption habits. As they relate to building a new wardrobe and shopping. So learning to make better fashion decisions is not just good for us and our wallets. It's good for the planet. And I'm assuming that, if you've done any type of high dose psychedelics, you probably care about the planet.
It's one of the ways that we really do need to do better as a humanity. It's in shifting our consumption habits.
I can see now how developing and discovering my personal style is the most effective way to shop sustainably, mindfully, intentionally, and to practice mindful consumption. Obviously, [00:39:00] it takes a lot of money to rebuild a wardrobe. And I will admit, I definitely got a little bit carried away at first when I was like, okay, I'm just, I'm doing it.
I want my wardrobe to reflect who I am and this was before I discovered this personal style journey. Now that I'm empowered with these insights and this information with the likes of Alison Bornstein and some other resources I will mention at the end, I am definitely shifting my consumption habits and being much more mindful of what I allow in and really keeping in mind like, will I be able to wear this for like at least five years to come?
Is this made in a quality that will allow me to keep it and wear it And does it feel good on my body? Now when I shop i'm able to refer to these three words and narrow down if it's truly something that expresses my personal style I've been thrifting a lot and i'm getting even pickier when i'm thrifting as well.
I found this amazing kind of sporty leather jacket the other day and I almost bought it and I was like This doesn't Feel like my three words like it was the thrill of the [00:40:00] fine finding this like twenty dollar danier leather jacket at the thrift and just you know feeling that sense of score and I put it back because I was like This doesn't define my personal style.
This is like a little bit too, sporty for me. And I don't really like jackets that don't have buttons. This jacket didn't have any buttons. I don't own anything without buttons. I love buttons. So I put it down. So that's an example of how being empowered with these three words and really understanding your personal style help you shift your consumption habits.
I also used to shop thinking, how do I look in this? Now what I am focused on is, does this feel like me? How do I feel in this? If you really tune into how you feel in certain clothing, you will get a lot. of insight into your personal style. I'm also focusing on higher quality, sustainable brands when I can, and I'm taking it really slow, giving myself [00:41:00] lots and lots of time to build a wardrobe.
That's not to say I won't ever buy fast fashion again, but I will do that with more intention and more emphasis on the quality of the item and just be a little bit more intentional with purchases. For example, A couple weeks ago, I bought a very timeless Oxford button up shirt from H& M, biggest fast fashion brand on the planet.
However, this was just such a timeless cut. I have a few of these Oxford cut Button ups in my wardrobe that I wear all the time. It's a blend of cotton and linen, so I know it's going to last and it's my style and it's timeless. And honestly, I've already worn it like three times a week since I bought it.
So really happy with that. It was intentional. I also want to talk about how similar to psychedelics, doing this work to find your personal style is it means you have to break some neural pathways and programming. That programming is [00:42:00] around what looks good or what looks bad, right?
Programming around like typical outfit formulas in our comfort zones as we're like exploring new edges of ourselves. We may be wanting to try prints and colors or try neutrals if we're more of a colorful dresser. We may have to break programming around trends and what the industry is telling us to wear.
Uh, We have to break programming around why we like what we like. So an example of this is tight clothing for me. I have always been known to wear very tight clothing and I think I had this belief that I had to wear tight clothing in order to, you know, show off my curves and be perceived as feminine and be perceived as sexy and all of that.
But when I really tune into my body and ask it if it likes wearing really tight clothing, it's a hell no. Like in most cases, I prefer a much more relaxed fit. And if it is [00:43:00] tight, I'm, I don't want to be wearing tight clothing from head to toe. So yeah, this programming around why do we like what we like is a Really interesting one.
I think it's also important to explore what I've always been naturally pulled towards. So Alison Bornstein talks about this in her book. It's the first step of the closet editing. You actually pull out all of the things that are your regulars, the things that you wear all of the time, and that alone gives you your first word.
So when I pulled out all of my regulars and all of the things that I'm just naturally drawn to without even thinking about it, I realized that the common theme was relaxed. Everything was a little bit relaxed. It was either like oversized or flowy. I didn't pull out too many things that were really tight and if they were really tight, they were like a more relaxed material.
So yeah, that's another little tip for helping you discover your personal style. So Guys, I'm not trying to be like a fashion icon or have a wardrobe full of designer [00:44:00] pieces or, anything like that. I really just want to feel like myself in all areas of my life so that I can just put my best foot forward like this is all related to Work and mission and purpose like I just want to feel like myself so that I can show up for myself And it's just a little little bit of refinement that is taking place There's a lot of people out there who are trying to make the fashion industry a better place in the name of sustainability I definitely want to give them credit and exposure.
I have learned so much from Alison Bornstein who I already mentioned The sustain this podcast. I don't even listen to podcasts Anymore for the most part like there's very few that I listen to but this one I have been binge watching their tagline is something like You know, it's about sustainability So much more than clothes and it's all about slow fashion, developing your personal style, sustainability.
And it is these three independent fashion content creators and stylists, and they've come together [00:45:00] to share their wisdom on slow fashion. So I really liked that podcast. Maybe I will try to get one of them on. Is that something you guys would like? Would you like to hear a little bit more about this topic?
If you would, Please do me a favor and just send me a DM on Instagram and let me know because I have no idea how this episode is going to land for you guys. But if you want me to do the like a round two and maybe invite one of the girls from that podcast on yeah, maybe that's something we could do.
That sounds fun. And then one last thing I want to share is this article I came across on the sustain this podcast. It's called how to build a sustainable wardrobe to get you through 2024 and 2034. It's got some really good tips on, yeah, just giving yourself space and time to build a wardrobe that you're going to love for years to come.
Okay, so I hope that you enjoyed that. This was definitely a little bit longer than I thought it would be, but I hope that you [00:46:00] enjoyed this. I definitely felt very strongly called to bring this topic forward to the community because it really does relate to psychedelic integration. I have not yet heard anyone talking about the difference between heavy lifting versus refinement in integration and just how nuanced working with psychedelics and the integration process is.
It's definitely identity work as much as anything else is, and it's closely related to sustainability, which is something that psychedelics are always reminding us to bring our focus to so yeah If you enjoyed this and you made it this far Just send me a DM and let me know what you thought .
This is totally out of the norm for this podcast, but whenever I am just so into something and just so lost in it. I feel like I need to share it with you guys because I cannot be the only psychonaut out there [00:47:00] who cares about sustainability, who cares about living in alignment with her values and who also loves fashion.
So there's got to be more of you out there. All right, I'm going to end it here. I hope that you enjoyed. Go enjoy the sunshine wherever you are. Sending you lots of love. Thanks for listening. And if you enjoy this, please leave a rating and review. It really helps. Bye.
