128 | Stop Healing, Start Integrating: The One Shift That Changes Everything
“Healing is seeking. Integration is seeing.”
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In this solo episode, we’re discussing a core insight from my own medicine path: the crucial energetic difference between healing and integration.
After years of ceremonies, coaching, and personal exploration, I realized that the constant search for healing was actually keeping me stuck in an identity of being “broken.” It wasn’t until very recently that I fully understood that wholeness doesn’t come from fixing, but from integrating who you already are.
This episode is an invitation to shift from a “healing orientation” rooted in victimhood and fixing, into an “integration orientation” rooted in authenticity, creativity, and self-acceptance.
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Topics Covered:
The trap of the “healing identity” and how it can keep us stuck
My personal journey from Ayahuasca, to 5-MeO-DMT, to Iboga
Why integration is about seeing, not seeking
The difference between a healing orientation vs. an integration orientation
Self-acceptance as the foundation of wholeness
How reclaiming forgotten parts of ourselves—like play, creativity, and joy—is part of integration
Practical reflections for recognizing when you’re fixing vs. truly integrating
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Things Mentioned in This Episode
Show Links:
Iboga Integration & Prep Coaching (NEW-now enrolling)
Psychedelically Informed Life Coaching (6 Month Program)
About Lana Pribic:
Lana Pribic, M.Sc., is an ICF Professional Coach, co-founder of Kanna Wellness, and producer & host of the Modern Psychedelics Podcast. With over 230 hours of professional training and four coaching certifications, Lana specializes in psychedelically-informed coaching, guiding individuals through profound inner transformation. Based in Ontario, she merges the power of psychedelics, consciousness, and self-discovery to facilitate deeply impactful experiences. When she's not immersed in her work, you'll likely find her dancing to electronic beats, creating art in the kitchen, practicing patience with her cat, curating her dream wardrobe, or diving into a book.
Looking for a professional coach to support you on your psychedelic path?
Look no further! Along with being the host of the Modern Psychedelics Podcast, Lana is a 3x certified professional coach who works with people on the psychedelic path.
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124 - Solo - Back to my Roots
Lana Pribic: [00:00:00] it's been about six weeks since my latest journey with Iboga, which was. Very powerful, and I am getting ready to travel to the Balkans for a month. Why the Balkans? Well, because that's where I am from. I was born in former Yugoslavia, the part that is now Bosnia and I have not been back in 15 years.
I keep saying that. I'm going back to my roots after the root. The root of course being iboga. And there's something about this trip that feels really meaningful and really special and what I'm noticing is that the last few years of integration, particularly since the first time I did Iboga, have been not even about.
Discovering who I am in this world, they have been much more about reclaiming who I really [00:01:00] am, and a lot of that has to do with my roots, my culture, you know, connecting to my family of origin in a way. But it also has to do with hobbies, interest, forms of expression that I let fall to the wayside during my years of searching and seeking and healing.
So in today's episode, I really want to reflect on this idea of reclaiming our roots, reclaiming who we truly are during this transformational period of time when we are working with. Medicines and maybe we're not even working with medicines, right? Maybe we are just simply on our journey and we are remembering who we are.
And I wanna share a story with you guys to really open this up. so my parents used to send me back home to Bosnia to visit when I was younger. They would put me on a plane all alone [00:02:00] and I would go and spend time there. They really wanted me to. Stay connected to the culture, to our relatives and to the language.
One year when I was, I would say 14 or 15, I was in high school. I went back home with my parents and being the young, curious girl that I was, I was looking for ways to, I guess, express myself. I didn't know this at the time, but. Looking back, that's really what I think I was doing.
Finding a way to understand and conceptualize the world, which is a very normal experience. For a 14-year-old, I picked up my parents' camera. Okay. This was before Instagram and you know, all these things like this was a film camera. I. Don't remember what made me do it, but I wanted to take photos and I took this [00:03:00] camera with some film to the Balkans.
We went to Bosnia and Croatia and. I remember during that trip I was taking these photos and it was like I was just putting on a perfectly fitted shirt that belonged to me. It just felt so natural. I. And photography was the first art form that I ever explored that felt like it just fit. I got it. I understood what it meant to paint with light, which is, by the way, what photography means to paint with light.
I could see the world through light. I had a very natural understanding of composition and framing and. Interesting subject matter. It was something that I just understood and I was relieved because I was never really any good at, you know, visual arts such as drawing. But it just felt so good to finally [00:04:00] find this tool of self-expression. But over the years I had become a professional photographer. I turned my hobby and my passion into my career, and with that I really lost my love for it. I was lugging heavy gear around all of the time at weddings.
I was constantly editing. I was struggling to make a business out of it. And eventually I, I quit that business and. I kind of lost my love for photography naturally because. It wasn't enjoyable anymore. It really took the fun out of it for me. And I actually sold all my pro photography gear last year to this man who had just moved to Canada and he was looking to get into photography and you know, he bought my camera body and my two pro lenses and my backpack and everything.
Everything. He bought all of it and I saved up that money. I spent some of it, but I saved up. [00:05:00] Just enough to purchase a new camera, and it took me about a year to actually purchase this new camera and I bought myself a little Fuji film just a month or two ago before my trip to Mexico. Bought myself this little Fuji film, the XT 32, and it.
It does just enough. It's not a pro camera, but it's so tiny and I got a little tiny lens and I feel this huge draw to start documenting and creating art out of what I see in the world through my photography. So. It feels very, very special that after this transformational iboga experience that I have described as me getting to the root, the thing that I've been trying to get to all of the years with my healing, that I'm going back home with this camera in my hands where I am going to be documenting [00:06:00] the way that I am seeing and relating to.
My home country, it feels very special and that's why I wanted to record this episode today because I'm learning so much that this work of healing is not about uncovering who you are as much as it is about. Really accepting who you already are, not fighting against that, and also remembering and reclaiming these things and these aspects of self that at some point along the way you learned was not cool or accepted or whatever it is.
For some reason, these aspects of self fall away and it's been so amazing to watch myself reclaim some of these parts. So. I wanna share my story with you today about how my work with psychedelic medicine has helped me to reconnect with my culture, my family, and my personal passions, and what that has really [00:07:00] all meant for me, and I hope that.
This episode is inspirational for you, and I hope that it encourages you to really look at your life, from a long, long view. Look at your life and who you've been in the past, and things you've enjoyed in the past. All those things that you've let go of. Really reflecting on why did you let go of them.
And are they a true part of you? And thinking about maybe re-exploring and reintegrating some of those things back into your life. And before we go any further
i'm assuming that if you are listening to this episode, you probably tune in almost every week if you don't, hi. Welcome. Would love to have you back. I wanna let you know that I have one spot available for my one-on-one six month transformational coaching program. I have just updated the website, updated the offering.
It's got a fresh feeling to it. [00:08:00] And I have one more spot for people looking to start coaching with me in June. It's a six month commitment and it's six months for a good reason. That's about how long it takes working with clients to really set a foundation for living a highly conscious and highly energetic life, which is what my coaching program is all about.
It's about integrating that higher state of consciousness, that higher state of being into the day to day. And what do I mean by that higher state of being. That state that we can usually access during and psychedelic experience and at some point after. But without the conscious tools and effort, it can be hard to really ground that into the day to day in a lasting way.
So. This high consciousness state of being is characterized by creativity, flow, connection to yourself and the world around you. It's a way of being that is non-judgmental, completely accepting, completely passionate about all of life's [00:09:00] experiences, not just the good ones. And it's also characterized by pure presence and energetic connection to the moment, which are basically all of the conditions that are required to.
Be our best. Create our best, and really tap into our intuition to guide you. So if you're one of those people listening who really live in the head, who over rely on their analytical mind, or maybe you have a hard time connecting to your emotions, the wisdom within them, and really listening to and honoring your intuition, then this program would be great for you.
If you're interested to learn more, I'll have. In the show notes for you, or you can go to modern psychedelics.net and there's a coaching tab there where you can explore the program. If you're ready to apply, it's modern psychedelics.net/apply. I would love to work with you, and I also have some amazing testimonials from past clients that are very generous and thorough.
So if you're thinking about it, go ahead and read some of those testimonials, and I would [00:10:00] love to hear from you. Okay, so let's get back to this idea of reconnecting to the roots. So, like I mentioned, psychedelics can be a very important tool for remembering. Remembering who we are. As I already mentioned, it's not about becoming someone new or becoming someone that you're not, but rather returning to your authentic self and who we were when we were younger.
Sure, we may have been not fully formed, not fully baked, but who we were when we were younger also holds such great clues to things that we were naturally drawn to before. Societal programming, before growing up, before getting jaded, before all of that. As we work with psychedelic medicine, as we increase our consciousness, as we increase our capacity to be aware and conscious and see things from a more nonjudgmental way, all of these lies [00:11:00] and illusions and false narratives about the self and about the world, they fall away, right?
And as these lies, these non-truths fall away. Well, what's left? The things that remain are the things that are really true to us and really a part of us, or perhaps they're aspects of self that want more airtime. They want to be integrated more. So I personally have found myself gaining such a new respect for my culture, my Balkan culture.
Also reconnecting to my family of origin, actually connecting to my family of origin because. I've always had a really difficult relationship with both of my parents, especially my dad, and this idea of reclamation. It even touches hobbies and interests and forms of expression, such as the photography that I told you about.
So this is really powerful because if [00:12:00] we're aware that when all of the lies fall away and all of the delusions melt away, what's left is really us. It can be a beautiful path of discovery and expression to follow that thread of who we once were because who we once were while. In this coaching space, in this transformational space and healing space, we love to talk about how like our old self is not who we are now and how our old self was blocked and keeping us back.
While yes, that's true, there's also aspects of our old self that are truth and that were for some reason or another suppressed and tucked away and not given the airtime that they want to. So. Psychedelics have a way of stripping away these layers of programming that really disconnect us from our roots.
I personally thought that I had to be a certain way in different parts of [00:13:00] my life. I, at one point when I was studying, I did my undergrad and my master's in economics. It was incredibly demanding. This was about a seven year period actually, when. Everything started breaking down for me and I had my mental health crisis begin, but during that time, you know, I thought I had to be a certain.
Person, this very academic, very studious, very logical, smart, well read, cultured like quote unquote cultured person who's aware of all of the world events and, and all of that. And guess what? I am not that. At least there's elements of a lot of what I just mentioned that. I'm just not, and I can see very clearly that putting on this mask of who I thought I was supposed to be during that time, created a lot of dysfunction and dissatisfaction, and it really pulled me [00:14:00] away from my roots and my truth.
But it was who I thought I had to be. Right. And that's not even. Exclusive to this period of time. That was very not me. I even experienced this costume wearing, when I first started sitting with Ayahuasca and entering this world of psychedelics. You know, , there was a very specific.
Way of speaking and way of being, way of dressing, , very specific books to be read, , belief systems to adopt that. I thought that I was supposed to, because I'm spiritual now and I drink ayahuasca now, and I am healing now, and I really put on the. Costume and wore this mask of what it means to be someone who works with plant medicine.
And what's happened over the years is that literally and figuratively, I have taken the costume off and I have put on my real [00:15:00] clothes. I think that the fashion journey that I've been on the last year or so. I can't believe it's actually only been a year because I've made so much amazing progress in feeling like myself in my clothing.
But I think it's such a beautiful metaphor because occupying certain spaces, we often think that we have to wear these costumes and posture and be interested in certain things. Like, for example, being interested in fashion was not something that was congruent with someone, or at least my idea of someone who drank ayahuasca.
And was very spiritual and highly conscious. It just did not align. And so I had this genuine love and interest for fashion my whole life. I've always loved it. And then all of a sudden. It fell away and I adopted the costume. I adopted the status quo of what I was supposed to look like. Over the last year, I really [00:16:00] made a commitment to myself to practice self-expression through getting dressed, and I've experimented a lot.
If you go look at my TikTok. Or even my personal Instagram, there's some pretty, like, I would say, embarrassing things that I've worn that were a process of me figuring out like, who am I really? Who am I really? And I swear, while this sounds so frivolous and service level, it's been actually so deep for me.
The fashion journey has been such a reconnection to my roots ever since I was first into fashion in high school. In university as a young woman who could finally afford her own clothing and all of that, I was always very drawn to this more European chic, ladylike, put together vibe That also had an element of like tomboy men's wear inspired.
And [00:17:00] I've really gone back to that, but I've also woven in this organic and relaxed element of myself that I have developed over the years, and I really see fashion and my reclamation of my love for that as a process of self-expression and reconnecting to my love for it. Has been so important to me on my path because I finally feel like me.
I finally feel like I'm not wearing a costume, and it just feels, it feels really good. It feels really good. But let's get into this reclamation of roots on a deeper level, the most significant way that I have reclaimed my roots is a reconnection to my culture.
So being born in former Yugoslavia and moving to Canada as a refugee at the age of four definitely came with challenges. I know that all of my listeners who live in North America and are [00:18:00] immigrants or. Children of immigrants and refugees can definitely relate. When I say that, you always feel like an outsider and.
I can say that growing up, you know, particularly in kindergarten, elementary school, middle school, I was still really trying to figure out who I was. And because I wanted so badly to fit in, I wanted the boys to like me. I wanted the girls to be friends with me. I wanted to be cool, right? Like, who doesn't, who doesn't wanna be cool?
I still wanna be cool. The only difference now is that I know I am cool now and I don't need to seek it from other people, but you know, I want it to be cool. I want it to be accepted. And I don't know what it's like these days for kids, but growing up from a different culture, like it wasn't. Cool. It wasn't celebrated, you know, I always felt like [00:19:00] an outsider and it was these really subtle ways.
Like for example, we never celebrated Christmas in the same way that Canadian families celebrated. And you know, my parents didn't really have much money when we were growing up. We didn't get like millions of presents. Like they didn't have hundreds and thousands of dollars to spend on Christmas.
Presents for us, and this was something that when I was younger, it just hurt so bad. It was so devastating to go to school after Christmas break and hear about all the presents that my friends got from their parents and to just feel like an outsider in that way. And over time, this really created a real sense of lack for myself.
But all of these little things together, they created this embarrassment and the shame around where IC came from. I wasn't always accepted, you know, my mom made me like some weird lunches with like smoked dried meats that smelled a little funny.
[00:20:00] Like my friends all had peanut butter and jelly sandwiches and I had like these weird Eastern European things. Like there's all these little things. Or even just in my way of speaking, I still struggle with speaking correctly. I would, and still do, pronounce my vowels differently because in the Bosnian language, an E sounds very different than an E Sounds in.
English so there were like these little ways that I would get made fun of and picked on. And so naturally my defense against that being someone who wanted to feel accepted and loved and led into the tribe, I assimilated, right? I became more and more Canadian, north American. I was so ashamed of my culture.
I didn't even wanna be heard speaking in Bosnian to my parents. I remember feeling so embarrassed all the time if I was at a friend's house and my mom called and she would speak to me in Bosnian and I would speak back in English because I didn't even want my culture to be.[00:21:00]
Perceived and all these years. I have an older brother who I don't speak about very often, but you know, he's like very in touch with the culture and he goes back home to visit multiple times a year. My parents go back to visit every summer, and that's been pretty consistent. I always thought I was too cool.
I had no interest in going back home. I always wanted to travel to other places. And I have to say that recently that has changed a lot. These cultural traditions and cultural mannerisms that haven't always been celebrated in social settings are things that I am leaning into more and more as I get older and.
It's not just these cultural traditions and ways of being and the food and you know, all of that. Every culture has their own way of being socially and all of those things, but also. [00:22:00] Psychedelic work has really softened my heart and helped me develop a lot of acceptance and understanding and compassion to see my family members through a more compassionate lens.
One of the first visions that I saw on Ayahuasca was a vision of my mom holding me in her arms as a baby and. Funny enough, she was wearing like a Chanel like suit. 'cause my mom was always so into fashion as well. Okay, this is a little tangent. My mom was also very into fashion as a young girl in Yugoslavia.
She would. She was a seamstress as well for local boutiques. She sewed a lot of her own clothes and my dad's clothes, and actually her friends would see her wearing things and they would ask her to to sew it for them as well. So she was quite a little trendsetter and my [00:23:00] passion for fashion. Definitely comes from her.
So back to this Ayahuasca vision. She was of course like in the middle of a war wearing this Chanel inspired suit, which I think is really funny. But she was basically holding me in her arms and running away from like bombs going off. And it was just a scene that was kind of like in the middle of the warm.
Don't know if it was true or not, but, uh, probably not. If she was wearing a Chanel like suit, I can assure you she would not have been wearing that in the middle of running away from a war. But, um, what that vision meant for me was that it was like. Look like this is where you come from. You know, this is the reality of the first year or two of your life.
And it brought on a new perspective of appreciation for my parents and everything they went through. You know, they were only in their thirties and had two young children dealing with the. Uncertainty [00:24:00] of a war, you know, being afraid for their lives.
And you know, it was something that up until then I didn't really appreciate or think about, let alone acknowledge as part of my lived experience. It was, let's just say a really sobering look at the first few years of my life Plant medicine also has a way of bringing us into our rawest emotional states.
I had a friend at my recent Iboga retreat that referred to Ayahuasca as ayahuasca, and I was like, word that is so accurate. I just did so much emotional processing for the weight of the world. You know, everything that my parents had been through all of the ways that I was such a bratty little child, an ungrateful little child who just didn't appreciate where she came from, and these experiences with plant medicine have helped me get so much closer with my parents.
My [00:25:00] mom specifically. She is my best friend. She's now my business partner as well. We started Kanna Wellness together and I've been supporting her in so many ways. We even shared an ayahuasca ceremony together when she got sick. She, she was like, I'll try anything. And it's been really beautiful to watch her.
Focus on herself a little bit. You know, she hadn't done that in a long time, and I can see that even though the Ayahuasca ceremony was like three years ago, I feel like she's still integrating certain elements of it and learning from it. And I think that it really taught her to. I don't wanna speak for her, but this is my observation of what I see happening.
It taught her to just prioritize herself more and see herself a bit more from an outside perspective, and that's just been so beautiful. I'm so supportive and protective of my mom in so many ways. I try to help her. As much as [00:26:00] possible, whether it's with chores or financially or just however I can help my mom, I will do it.
Where as before, I was such a little brat and just so entitled and wanted everything to be done for me instead of I. Being there to also help and, and be supportive. So that's one big change. And I, I think that's, yes, partially because of medicine work and this raw emotional state that I've tapped into around.
My parents and their grief and just how strong and amazing they are. It's partially probably 'cause she was sick a little a couple years ago and I faced losing her and , I'm sure part of it is also maturation as well. But I've definitely noticed a massive shift in how I show up for my relationship with my parents.
And our parents are, you know, they're a massive piece of our root system. And so when we create those shifts in our own [00:27:00] roots, of course we're going to create shifts in how we show up for those relationships. It really feels like we're on the same team. , It feels like. We're really operating as a family for the first time, I think ever, and that is so beautiful.
Now it's like, oh my God. Imagine that They also all did. As much plant medicine work or even a fraction of it that I did. Whoa, that would be crazy. But also this serves as a reminder that so many shifts and changes can happen in relationships with other people, with you just doing your work. Because as soon as you start showing up differently, you're giving them an opportunity to show up differently.
And there is, there's a lot of power in that. I'm also learning to love and accept my dad as he is. I've had a very tumultuous relationship with my dad. You know, major daddy issues for me, and again, I'm sure part of this is maturing and getting older, but what I'm really [00:28:00] working with is to accept his love in the way that he can give it to me rather than
how I wish he could give it to me, and this is such an ongoing process, but learning to accept him despite what I perceive to be his limitations, like this is new for me, this is new for me. And I think it really speaks to the importance of reconnecting with my roots, acknowledging how important my relationship and connection is with them, and also knowing the limitations, knowing that I can't get necessarily what I want and need from my dad, from my mom, and that.
There's also places where I have to self resource, and I think that's really healthy And even with my brother, I've been showing up very differently over the years. Him and I had a really not great relationship growing up. And I think it's only in the last few years where we're like very civil with each other, we're able to be around each [00:29:00] other without having an argument. And I definitely credit my work to that.
And of course he has also been growing in his own ways and I'm so proud of him. But. Yeah, this is, this is big stuff. This, return to love for family. This return to the family of origin has been huge and. Even with my culture and my traditions, I think I spoke into this a little earlier, but there's just been so much more of a curiosity and acceptance, a love for cultural traditions, uh, the food even.
I used to resist Balkan food so much. I was just so embarrassed of all of it. And it's been so beautiful to just really allow myself to be the Balkan woman that I am and to keep the parts of my culture that I like and to learn more about the parts that I like, and then also to mature out of, and leave behind some of those things about my culture that I don't like, for [00:30:00] example.
Alcohol is a huge part of Balkan culture. It's consumed a lot. There is one particular alcohol called the Akia, which is like moonshine level. Strong people drink a lot. Our parties always have a lot of alcohol. They're always really loud. Um, and that is something that just does not resonate with me. It's something that energetically I am not connected to and it's a part of my culture that I'm leaving behind.
And that's okay. But when it comes to some of the traditional dishes that my mom makes, I'm like, can you please teach me? Because I want to be able to make these, if I ever have children or if I, you know, one day when you are gone, I want to be able to carry on your legacy of creating these dishes.
And , with that, actually another thing that's coming to me is also this idea of keeping the family. Not legacy, but like the spirit of the [00:31:00] family alive. And I go back and forth a lot on whether I want to have children or not. On one hand I'm like, Ugh, I don't, Ugh. No, it's not for me. And on the other hand, there's a primal desire to have children and to.
You know, have a little human who is a piece of me, who's a piece of my mom, who's a piece of my dad, and to kind of continue the family lineage in that way, like I said, it's very primal. That's something T-B-D-T-B-D, but right now I am incredibly single and can't even be thinking about having children.
But yeah. I guess that's one of those like, that's one of those things that, yeah, this root medicine journey has been teaching me is the importance of, yeah, keeping on family traditions, cultural traditions. I have been practicing my Bosnian a lot for my Bosnian listeners. I will say that.[00:32:00]
There you go. From embarrassed to be heard and perceived speaking in Bosnian to speaking Bosnian in public. There you go. I've been practicing. My grammar is awful, but it's something that at one point I was okay with allowing to fade and not have a connection with, and now I'm like, no, I cannot lose my mother tongue.
I need to be able to speak it. And this is very important, so. Very excited for this trip to the Balkans to be able to refresh and just get back into it because I really, really need it. So that's a little bit about this coming back to my roots, reclaiming my roots, and healing my roots through plant medicine.
and I told you guys a little bit about how. Fashion and photography were also these things that I allowed to fall to the side because there is [00:33:00] these stories around like who that would make me. And there's been a process of rediscovering. That these are things that I love and are important to me and I want to reconnect with them.
Cooking is another example of something that has been a lifelong passion for me, and I don't know what it is, but ever since going really deep with plant medicine, I have. Enjoyed cooking more than ever, particularly making more nutritious meals. I just, I just love it. But reclaiming these parts of myself that were lost or neglected.
You know, I thought I wasn't supposed to be, or like some of these things because who I was becoming, I'm not sure, but eventually. I learned that fashion was frivolous and not aligned with who I was at that time, and I gave up on photography because, I don't even know why I think that I [00:34:00] was just so disconnected from my sense of joy and the importance of self-expression that I kind of just allowed it to fall away.
And I cannot tell you guys how. Good. It feels to be reclaiming and reconnecting to these things. So it really is all about embracing a wholeness that includes all parts. It's about embracing all of us. You can be psychedelic and earthy and. Connected and spiritual, and you can love fashion and you can love photography, and you don't have to be an amazing visual artist.
You can take photos instead for your form of self-expression. It isn't about becoming someone else. It's about remembering and reclaiming who you truly are on so many levels. So I'm just so grateful [00:35:00] for this medicine path, for how it has allowed me to expand my consciousness, to tap into creativity, to listen to my intuition.
I. To connect to my body and to see the importance of my root system, my family of origin, my ancestors, my culture, where I come from. This is all a part of me, and so I'm so excited to get back to the Balkans after 15 years away and document it all through this. New lens of mine, literally and figuratively, right?
I'm gonna be going there with my new little Fuji film, but I literally have a new lens, a new take, a new perspective on life. And you know, who knows? I might even make a little photo book of it, I don't know, but I'm gonna go with the flow. I will be documenting all of it through my personal Instagram. So if you don't.
Follow me there. It's just Lana Pri, [00:36:00] L-A-N-A-P-R-I-B-I-C, and I'll be sharing a lot of photos there. I'm sure I'll be posting on modern psychedelics as well. All of my insights and. Whatever it is that I'm learning, and I'll definitely be dropping a couple of vlogs on YouTube, which by the way, if you're not subscribed on YouTube, definitely get over there.
It's modern psychedelics. It's linked in the show notes, and I'm just getting more into vlogging expression, artistry, creativity, like that's the energy that I'm leaning into, whether it's through my fashion expression, whether it's through my photography, whether it's through writing. I just want to be creating at this point in my life and allowing my healing journey to be brought to life through the things that I'm creating.
And that's just, that's just it for me right now. So.
What I'm really looking forward to during this trip is [00:37:00] reconnecting with some of my family members that I haven't seen in so long, aunts, cousins, nieces, and nephews. I unfortunately don't have any more grandparents who are alive, but I'm also just so excited to see Belgrade. Rad for, for us, Balkans. I've actually never been to the city that I can remember apparently.
It is really cool and amazing. So if you are looking for somewhere in Europe to travel, that's definitely off the beaten path. Check out the Balkans. Obviously Croatia is very well known, but we'll be going over there. I have an aunt and uncle who lived there and I'm just so excited to swim in the Adriatic Sea.
There is nothing. Like that body of water. I'm sure there's some amazing seas around the world, but wow, that is the best body of water that I have personally ever swam in. Just so clean, so warm. Just the best. I'm such a little [00:38:00] Mediterranean baby. I. Belong there. A part of my soul feels so empty and just longs for and lusts for being there.
So I'm so excited to see what this journey brings and I'll be documenting it all. So come follow along.
And on top of all of that, I'm currently sober, not drinking alcohol, of course, but also not smoking cannabis, just staying sober, allowing this iboga integration to take its course. So I think that's gonna also be a really nice added layer to this trip, like it really is about staying sober. Really connecting and creating and I can't wait.
So thank you so much for listening. I hope you enjoyed this episode. It was pretty unscripted. I'm trying out, again, something new here. I usually script out most of my episodes and really think about what I want to say beforehand. This time [00:39:00] I only had some talking points and I really enjoy just flowing with you guys.
So let me know what you think about this. More flowy. Present moment oriented style of podcasting. And if you made it this far, definitely leave a rating on Spotify, on Apple. Or if you're watching on YouTube, click the thumbs up and give it a subscribe because there's some really fun video based content that is coming here.
And I wanna invite you to. Really reflect on what parts of yourself you have reclaimed since starting your journey with psychedelics. And that can be as shallow or as deep as you want it to be because it all matters and it's all connected. And what are some parts of yourself that you feel like you are being called to or curious to reclaim?
What are some of those things that you used to [00:40:00] enjoy or things that used to bring you joy that have kind of fallen away and. What might happen for you if you reclaim them? Let me know. Leave me a comment on Instagram. Send me a d. Um, I love to hear from you.
I love you so much. Have an amazing summer. Who knows? I might do a little podcast live from the Mediterranean. We'll see, but we'll talk soon and just sending you so many blessings on your journey.
